There’s a fundamental difference between advice and opinion, and understanding this distinction can make or break conversations, relationships, and even decision-making.
Advice is actionable. It’s based on experience, knowledge, or expertise. It’s offered with the understanding that the person receiving it will evaluate it against their own experiences, needs, and circumstances before deciding whether to apply it. Opinion, on the other hand, is often just personal preference, bias, or belief with no expectation of usefulness beyond self-expression.
This is something many people misunderstand.
Advice Is Valuable. Opinion Is Just Noise.
When someone gives advice, they’re offering insight that could be useful. Maybe they’ve been in a similar situation, or they’ve studied the issue in depth. Maybe they have expertise in a relevant field. Good advice comes from a place of knowledge, experience, or at least thoughtful reasoning.
This doesn’t mean all advice is good or must be followed. It means that advice is at least worth considering. It’s another data point in the decision-making process. It might be accepted, rejected, or adapted, but it serves a purpose.
Opinions, however, are often just self-serving declarations. They are statements about how you feel rather than what I should consider. “I wouldn’t do it that way.” “I think that’s a bad idea.” “I don’t like what you’re doing.” Okay. And? That tells me more about you than about what I should actually do.
This aligns with what Marcus Aurelius wrote in Meditations: “Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.” He understood that people mistake their own viewpoints for objective reality. Advice acknowledges subjectivity but aims to provide useful guidance. Opinion just asserts a personal stance as if it should matter to others.
The Ego Problem
People get offended when their opinions aren’t taken seriously because they conflate their opinions with their identity. They believe rejecting their opinion is rejecting them as a person. That’s not the case.
Your advice is being considered. Your opinion is being ignored. That’s not personal. It’s practical.
This is a concept echoed in The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson, where he discusses how people place too much importance on their feelings and opinions. He argues that just because you feel something doesn’t mean it’s important or valid to others. The same applies here: just because you have an opinion doesn’t mean it’s relevant to my decisions.
The Role of Experience
Live experience outweighs opinion every time. If you’ve actually been in a situation, your advice is more credible than someone who is just speculating. That’s why advice from people who’ve been there is valuable, while armchair opinions are useless.
Ryan Holiday’s The Obstacle Is the Way emphasizes learning from experience, using obstacles as opportunities. Those who have tackled real challenges have meaningful advice. Those who just have opinions about how things should be done usually don’t.
How to Offer Advice That Matters
If you want your words to have weight, ask yourself:
- Am I giving advice or just stating an opinion? If it’s the latter, reconsider whether it needs to be said.
- Is this based on experience or expertise? If you haven’t been in the situation, recognize the limits of your insight.
- Am I offering something useful, or just making a judgment? If all you’re doing is reacting emotionally, it’s not advice… it’s just noise.
At the end of the day, advice is an offering. It’s given with the understanding that the recipient will do with it what they will. Opinion is often just an expectation that others should care about your personal preferences.
Advice matters. Opinion doesn’t. If you want to be heard, offer something worth listening to.